Egg Shelly Wood Lurk Kill

By Travis Lyle a.k.a DJ Hedmekanik
Yep, I grew up in....drumroll, maestro, please...the Eighties (cymbal crash).

Dunno about you but...hell, I'm not even fully qualified to comment on this but hey, that's never stopped me, so...there's a lot of 80s revibe going on out there in the rarefied atmosphere of the interweb. So much so that yesterday I downloaded a mix set off Hot Biscuits from a dude named Sparkletone...and...excuse me a moment while I take a deep breath and consider the ramifications...holycrapsakes...the mix starts with 'Girl You Know It's True' by, yes yes I know, Milli Vanilli...and no, it doesn't get much better, although the dude has mixing skills. The funny thing is, they're gushing about this stuff out there in blogosphere. Now, I'll admit I've gotten some pretty nifty fidget remixes off blogs like Palms Out, Red Threat and others, but some of the stuff is so overboard you're tempted to chuck it a life preserver.

Now is it just me or has the whole 80s revisited thing just boiled up and over the rim of the melting pot and begun to get a whole lot of sloppy all over the Kitchen's floor? I reckon. The 80s...they gave us some good shit: synth took centre stage, and some kick-ass rock music also managed to stay alive through the cocaine blizzard and toxic clouds of New Romantic hairspray.
Shit, some of the finest tunes I have are 12" remixes from Razormaid, Ben Liebrand et al. However, when the dregs are hauled back outta the barrel to see the light of day once again - despite many people vowing on pain of death that they would preserve the world's sanity by ensuring that they would not - and rehashed for all the world to see and hear, something has gone awry.

Let's just put a qualifier in here - hey, we can, right? - some of the fashion and music of today that's inspired by the eighties IS cool, shit, I wear and I play some of it, so I'm in up to my balls. BUT when the envelope gets pushed so hard you can see the veins in the poor thing's eyes standing out, we have to question the distance to which things have been taken. Too far? Not half. Take, for example, that muppet Corey Delaney (below) who had the ultra-violent house party in Melbourne, Oz, last year and thereafter refused (on TV) to take his bilious lumo yellow sunnies off because 'I lurk killin thumb'. He, for one, is a prime example of how the worst of the eighties - yellow sunnies? I ask you with tears in my arse - have been regurgitated. As we can see from Exhibit A, Your Honour, 'taint even the good bits. (Now Corey, mate, if they'd been black, those sunnies, well, then you egg shelly wood lurk kill, mite.)

Exhibit A

Christsakes. The next thing you know, it'll be all Boy London T-shirts, baggy high-waisted primary colour jeans, belt buckles the size of a radiator grille and...damn. Let's just stop right there, it's better not to tempt fate. I saw that stuff first time round wasn't pretty, Judge.

Anyway, somewhat tenuously related to the rant of the week is this pretty damn fine tune which I got from Slutty Fringe - yes, ladies and beerpurifiers, it's a fairly fidgety rework of Tainted Love by Soft Cell. And I like it.

Soft Cell - Tainted Love (C90's Remix).mp3


4 comments so far.

  1. Anonymous July 9, 2008 at 4:07 PM
    I know Sparkle's mix isn't the best, it's not even really my style of music.

    He's a good friend of mine and I decided to post some of his stuff for his birthday. I agree with you that his track selection is a little "weird" haha.
  2. hedmekanik July 9, 2008 at 4:10 PM
    Hey Biscuits;

    Hell, maybe it's just cos the originals were so damned corny in the day. Mind you, I did listen thru till the end...hehe.

    But the dude's got skills, that's a no-brainer.

    Tell him Happy Birthday from darkest Africa!

  3. pierce August 5, 2008 at 7:33 PM
    hi there guys,
    great blog!
    i am need of some help relating to the Mr.John Rothman entertainer at the Kylami ranch and also Durban stints...looking for info of who the man is/was and all the antics.
    this is for a swiss article on gay entertainers of south africa 80s
  4. hedmekanik August 6, 2008 at 8:12 AM
    Hey Pierce;

    Glad you like the blog.

    The only matching info I can find on a John Rothman is found at this link:

    concerning camp performance in Durban bars and hotels of the 1970s and 80s.

    There is also mention of a person by the same name in relation to tourism and hotel grading, who may or may not be the same.

    A search using would be your best shot.

    Cheers, and good luck with it.

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